InTERRYgation: Extended Edition

Questions by Henry Tollett, Staff Writer

General Journal: What would you do if you found gold at the end of a rainbow?

Coach Terry: The first thing I would do is search the place for a leprechaun guarding the pot of gold. I don’t want to be stabbed in the Achillies with a shard of tree branch as I begin to retrieve the treasure. But if it is unguarded and I can take the gold . . . I would go buy a car load of Skittles


GJ: Have you ever frolicked through a meadow?

CT: I grew up in a meadow and there was much frolicking. Along with youth and innocence, I lost the ability to frolic as I grew old. Frolicking is wasted on the young


GJ: Why do we have Daylight Savings?

CT: Foolish isn’t it? We’re not saving daylight. It is us who need saving. When we created 9-5 workdays we became slaves to the clock rather than partners with the sun. The 9-5 workdays is a defective invention compared to the perfectness of the universe. But now we cannot abandon the 9-5, like a slave cannot abandon its master.


GJ: Do you like sunny weather?

CT: I prefer cloudy. Sunny hurts my eyes.


GJ: What are you doing over Spring Break?

CT: No big plans. Clean the basement (I’d rather not.)? Go camping a few days maybe? That might be fun.


GJ: Do you feel that you should have won the talent show?

CT: No. I never considered our act even eligible for the contest. I just enjoyed Participating. Plus, Maya was amazing! I loved her song.


GJ: Do you think it’s fair for a student to potentially have to compete with his or her teacher in the talent show?

CT: Again, I don’t think teachers should be eligible for the talent show contest. But I do think it is cool for teachers or teacher groups to perform.


GJ: What do you think about people who pinch others on St. Patrick’s Day?

CT: If you are in high school and you still pinch, you are very immature. Not everyone is Irish or an alcoholic. Don’t pinch your beliefs on everybody else.


GJ: Do you enjoy the warm weather of spring?

CT: Yes. I’ve always liked it getting warm enough to play sand volleyball out behind HHS. I’ve got a lot of good memories out there. Thank you class of 2010 for your coupon book sales.


GJ: Are you happy about being closer to the end of the school year?

CT: It seems like a long while off but at least I can see the tunnel.


GJ: How do you deal with spring’s increase in pollen?

CT: Local honey. Mother earth provides for her inhabitants. You just have to be willing to ignore the shouting from big pharmaceutical companies. I don’t need Claritin . . . just the sweet nectar of the bees.


GJ: How should students spend their time outside?

CT: Hammocks and Frisbees (not at the same time)!


GJ: How would you react to being pinched on St. Patrick’s Day?

CT: If you pinch, I punch.


GJ: Do we do enough to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day at Heritage?

CT: I don’t know about St. Patrick’s Day, but I would like to see more celebrations around the Vernal Equinox. We could plant runes in the village green, go on a worm walk around the wetlands, or honor the birds by bringing in hair from out hairbrushes at home to set out for their nests. Oh, and a candle lit labyrinth walk in the academic courtyard would be fun!